Soul’s Song © May 2001

by Lisa Countryman

This is something I whipped out after seeing Tough Love. The songs mentioned are referenced at the end, complete with lyrics for anyone who is interested.

Disclaimers: Joss owns them. I borrowed them.

Spoilers: Everything through Tough Love with speculation about future events.

Warnings: Angst, angst, and for variety…angst.

This was written as a stand alone, but I do have an idea where I would like to take it. I’m just waiting until after the next episode. *G*

Soul’s Song © May 2001, Lisa Countryman

Willow watched Tara; the blonde sat beside her rocking with the motion of the moving vehicle. They had escaped Glory for the time being. A quick retreat through the dorm room door had allowed Buffy, Dawn, Willow and Tara to get away. Now they were on the run with the rest of the Scoobies in Spike’s run down RV.

‘Who knew Spike had an RV?’ Willow thought as she sat in the back of the beaten up vehicle. She looked at the dusty curtains and then toward the front of the RV where Giles was driving. She sighed as her heart ached; she wanted to feel Tara’s arms around her and hear the soothing alto tones of her lover’s reassuring words, but that wasn’t going to happen.

"They cut off their tails," Tara said earnestly. She touched Willow’s cheek with her uninjured left hand.

Willow sadly looked over at her lover.

"They’re blind, but the stars twinkle." Tara’s eyes were full of love but her face showed her frustration. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Willow?" she asked plaintively.

"It’s okay, Tara." Willow pulled Tara closer and kissed her temple. She fought back a fresh wave of tears as she felt Tara’s good hand rubbing her back in an attempt to soothe the redhead.

"Willow," Tara whispered uncertainly. She took several quick breaths as if fighting to get her words out. "Tigers hunt in pairs." Tara sighed in frustration and closed her eyes. She sagged against her lover’s body.

"I love you," Willow whispered. She felt Tara give her a gentle squeeze. "And I know you’re in there, love." She swallowed hard and willed her tears not to fall. "Somewhere," she added in a hushed whisper.

"You ready for lunch, Willow?" Buffy asked from the front of the RV. The Slayer stood and moved back toward the redhead. "There’s a town up ahead and we need to stop for gas anyway."

"You hungry, baby?" Willow asked her beloved.

Tara sat up and looked at Buffy. Her expression was completely confused as if seeing the Slayer made her want to bolt from the moving vehicle.

"It’s okay," Willow said as she squeezed Tara’s hand. She looked over at Buffy. "She feels bad about telling Glory," Willow explained.

"How can you tell?" Buffy asked, not quite believing the redhead could make any sense of Tara’s ramblings and odd looks. She studied Tara. The blonde seemed frightened.

"She’s my girl," Willow explained sadly.

"Tara, it’s not your fault," Buffy said gently. She knelt in front of the timid blonde. "Are you hungry?"

Tara looked over at Willow and her blue eyes locked on green. She nodded.

"Lunch sounds good." Willow looked at Buffy and smiled.

They arrived in a small desert town about 10 minutes later. Willow’s first thought as she looked out of the grime-coated window was that the town was abandoned. The buildings were all covered with dust and hadn’t seen a coat of paint since before Willow was born. She took another look and changed her mind. These buildings hadn’t seen paint since before Giles was born.

Buffy and Xander went to scout a small diner while Giles re-fueled the RV. Willow sat inside and brushed Tara's silky blond hair while Anya watched from the small bed at the back of the vehicle were she had been sleeping.

"Should we wake Spike?" Anya asked. She stared at Tara. The ex-vengeance demon wondered if she could call her former employer and have him deal with Glory. Probably not, she decided. D’Hoffryn might be a powerful demon, but he was no match for a god.

"I’m not asleep." Spike peeked out of a tiny closet. "Bloody hard to sleep with all that racket going on." The vampire quickly pulled the door shut. "And can you show a little respect. Close the bloody window. It’s my damned RV; why do you think I put in those god awful curtains?"

"I kinda like them." Willow looked at the black velvet curtains and smirked. The thick fabric had a hint of purple and reminded the Wiccan of a grand old movie theater.

"Why does that not surprise me?" Spike asked from closet. "Just close them."

Willow set aside the hairbrush and closed all of the curtains. She smiled at the closet door. "You can come out now, Spike. Some big scary vampire you are… hiding in the closet."

"I’d like to see how brave you’d be with your skin bursting into flames," Spike replied.

"Yeah, I can’t believe you of all people would tease Spike about being in the closet," Anya quipped.

"Anya, shut up." Willow’s eyes narrowed. She still felt horrible about her argument with Tara before Glory had attacked the blonde. The argument had started about magic but somehow escalated into angry words questioning Willow’s sexually. Neither had meant to hurt the other, but with Tara’s condition, they hadn’t been able to have any closure. Jokes about being in the closet were the last thing Willow wanted to hear.

"I’m just saying that you took long enough to come outta the closet…" Anya began.

"Howling cats!" Tara stood and glared at Anya. She looked back at Willow and then faced the former demon. "They neuter cats. Snip, snip, snip." She paced in the cramped space of the vehicle, picking at the bandage on her right hand. "London Bridges cross the sea, but they never come out of the tower."

"Shh." Willow wrapped her arms around her lover from behind. "We should get lunch. Doesn’t that sound nice?"

"What about me?" Spike carefully opened the closet door and came out once he saw that the curtains had all been safely pulled. "Any blood banks in this place?"

"You aren’t getting human blood." Willow twisted her head and gave Spike her determined look. "Maybe we can find a butcher that has some nice pig’s blood."

"You’re Jewish and you’re trying to get me to drink pig’s blood?" Spike smirked. "My, my, miss Rosenburg, what would your parents say?"

"That I should just stake you and go to Temple?" Willow suggested.

"Fine, get the pig’s blood," Spike said. "But it better be fresh." He flopped onto the bed at the back of the RV. "And no more locking Spikey in the closet. I want those curtains closed from now on."

"Tara likes to look outside," Willow protested.

"Darkness," Tara whispered. "Dark blankets all around." She pointed at Spike and scowled.

"Well, someone appreciates my dark side." Spike smiled brightly.

The door to the RV rattled and Spike yanked the blankets over his head as Buffy climbed up the stairs.

"Okay, I found us a place to get snackage." The Slayer looked over at Willow. "You guys ready?"

Willow nodded.

"Finally. I’m starving," Anya pushed past Willow and Tara and then Buffy before running down the stairs.

Buffy shook her head and motioned for Willow to follow.

"Don’t forget my blood," Spike yelled from under then blankets. "And close the bloody door!"

Buffy led the small group toward a diner at the end of the block. There were only five buildings, two of which were vacant. The diner was called Mabel’s, and the neon light that hung over the door looked like it hadn’t worked in at least five years.

Next door to the diner was a bar aptly called "the Dive." The door was propped open with a barstool and loud music blared from inside. Several motorcycles were parked against the curb.

Tara followed quietly as Willow pulled her down the street. When they passed the bar the blonde paused and looked into the open door. She smiled and pulled free of Willow’s grasp.

"Tara? No, honey," Willow said patiently. She took her lover’s hand. "Come on," she said gently.

Tara shook her head and tried to pull away. She smiled as she listened to the sounds coming out of the bar and swayed to the rhythm of the music.

Buffy looked back and frowned. Every time she saw Tara acting strangely it reminded the Slayer that she had failed both Tara and Willow.

"She likes the music," Giles said gently. He had finished fueling the RV and was waiting in front of the diner for Buffy and the others.

"She always has," Willow said as she tugged a little harder. "Tara?"

Tara frowned and kept looking at the bar but she did move along beside Willow.

They sat at a booth in the back of the restaurant. Buffy asked for the private table because she didn’t like people staring while Willow fed Tara. There was something perverse about watching a once strong willed and competent, albeit shy, woman reduced to being a walking child. Buffy didn’t need the added weight of strangers’ stares.

The group ordered and sat quietly around the table. After fourteen hours on the road, they were talked out. Tara stared blankly at the table while Willow studied the blonde for any sign of improvement. Willow’s expression was brokenhearted, yet hopeful. She looked for some sign of the quick, goofy wit her lover used to display at the oddest times. Even a brief flash of the sparkle that used to take Willow’s breath away would have been enough at this point.

The others found interesting things to look at around the room so they wouldn’t have to see Tara’s lost expression or Willow’s crestfallen eyes.

The waitress brought lunch and the small group seemed to come at least partially back to life.

"Grease and fat, two of the four food groups," Xander said as he poured a pile of ketchup next to his huge hamburger.

"And don’t forget sugar," Buffy said as she stuck a straw into her thick chocolate malt.

Willow smiled at her friends and then reached for Tara’s grilled cheese sandwich. It was the blonde witch’s favorite vice, cheddar cheese piled between two slices of sourdough bread and then grilled to greasy perfection.

"No!" Tara rocked back in the booth and gave Willow a frustrated glare. "Fishes on bicycles!" She blew her bangs out of her face and pushed away Willow’s hand.

"You wanna’ try?" Willow asked with infinite patience.

"Um, is that a good idea?" Dawn remembered Tara’s last attempt at feeding herself. It had ended with soup splashed liberally across the carpeting.

"She wants to try," Willow said without looking away from Tara.

Tara reached for the plate with her right hand, which was in a thick, cumbersome cast. She bumped the table and let out a frustrated breath and then looked over at Willow.

"Try your other hand, love." Willow carefully guided Tara’s cast bound hand to her lap and then took the uninjured left one. "Remember when we tried using chopsticks left handed last month?" Willow smiled and leaned down and caught Tara’s eyes.

Tara’s eyes lit up and she looked at Willow with complete love and devotion. The spark Willow had been missing was there.

"This time it’s just your fingers," Willow said as her voice cracked. She helped Tara pick up the sandwich and then leaned back.

Tara’s brow furrowed in concentration but she managed to clumsily lift the sandwich to her mouth. She smiled triumphantly and looked over at her lover. "Half camels at the pound," she said happily.

Willow bit her lip and then leaned over and left a lingering kiss on Tara’s temple. "I love you too," she whispered. She could tell by the tone and Tara’s expression exactly what her lover was trying to say. Her heart swelled. The phrase sounded like nonsense but Willow remembered a night when Tara had made up a silly story about finding Miss Kitty at the pound. The two lovers had joked playfully about the exotic beasts that were there with Kitty, including a half camel and several dolphins. For Willow, it was a hopeful sign.

"And dolphins." Tara continued to clumsily eat her sandwich.

"Many dolphins at the pound," Willow replied with a vigorous shake of her head.

"Oh, god, it’s contagious," Anya said as she pointed at Willow. "Do something before we’re all babbling like idiots."

Willow glared at Anya.

"Shut up," Buffy ordered angrily.

"She’s doing it now," Anya pointed out. "And Tara’s getting worse. What the hell is a half camel? That’s sick."

"She’s doing better," Willow said as she wiped Tara’s mouth with a napkin.

The others exchanged worried glances but no one questioned Willow’s observations. They couldn’t see any sign of improvement, but they weren’t about to dampen Willow’s optimistic mood.

Tara’s face suddenly went blank and her hand fell to her lap. The sandwich fell onto the floor, forgotten as Tara’s eyes lost their spark. The blonde began to slowly sway from side to side and she seemed to be looking through the surface of the table. "They need signatures. They can’t run the lambs without them."

Willow swallowed hard and then reached down and picked up the half-eaten sandwich. She wrapped it in a napkin and put it at the edge of the table for the waitress to retrieve. She looked at Tara but there was no sign of her lover. She took a deep breath and called on her inner resolve. "You need to eat more," Willow said gently. She picked up a French fry and dipped it into the ketchup so that it had a light dusting of the condiment, just the way Tara liked it. "Eat, honey." Willow held the offering to the distant blonde.

Tara grimaced and turned away.

Everyone at the table suddenly stared intently at their own plates. None of them could stomach seeing Tara so completely and utterly lost.

They finished lunch in relative silence and Giles took care of the bill. Willow took Tara to the restroom behind the diner. They finished and quietly returned to the table. The others hadn’t seen the two witches coming and were deep in conversation.

"There’s no way of knowing," Giles said quietly.

"None of Glory’s other victims recovered," Buffy said as she locked eyes with her Watcher. "We can’t let Willow hold on to false hope."

"Well, none of them recovered," Anya said as she clung to Xander. "But, the queller demon did slaughter a whole mess of them in the hospital so maybe they would have gotten better." She was having more trouble accepting Tara’s condition than she had with Joyce’s death. At least Joyce’s death had been natural, and her suffering ended. Anya would look at Tara and cringe. The blonde witch’s predicament was definitely not natural and there was no end in sight.

"What if another queller demon comes?" Dawn asked.

"Then I’ll kill it," Buffy said. "As for Tara, we need to prepare Willow for the worst."

"She will get better," Willow said firmly from behind the Slayer.

"Willow…" Buffy spun and looked at her best friend. "I… we…we were just…"

"I know what you were doing." Willow sighed and pulled Tara closer.

"I need to wash my hands," Dawn said as she hurried away.

"Be careful," Buffy warned.

"She’ll be fine," Xander said with a disarming smile. "I mean…Dawn." He saw Willow’s eyes darken. "And well, Tara too…"

"We should be going," Giles said. "Buffy can wait for Dawn while we all-"

A scream from the direction of the restrooms made everyone turn their heads. It was Dawn, and she sounded terrified.

"Dawn!" Buffy sprinted down the narrow hallway that led to the restroom behind the diner.

"Stay with her," Willow said to Xander. She ran after the Slayer and tried to think of a few spells that might come in handy.

"Beg my mother." Tara shook her head.

"Easy," Xander said as he moved the blonde away from the hallway.

"Nothing to worry about," Giles told the small group of patrons who had stood and moved closer. He looked down the hall and then trotted toward the exit. "Get ready to leave," he yelled over his shoulder.

"Come on," Anya said gently. She tugged Tara toward the front exit.

"Treachery!" Tara looked over her shoulder where she had seen Willow disappear.

"Willow’s in the RV," Anya said brightly. "She’s waiting for you."

Tara crinkled her brow and slowly allowed Anya to pull her out the door.

"I’ll meet you there," Xander said as he ran down the hall.

Buffy ran out the back door of the diner and saw Dawn near a dumpster. The young brunette was shaking and had backed against the wall of the building.

"Dawn!" Buffy reached into her jacket and yanked out a stake. It wasn’t the most versatile weapon, but it was all she had.

"Buffy?" Dawn looked over at her sister as Willow ran up beside the Slayer.

"Cerberus stand beside me with your snapping jaws…" Willow began to chant a spell that would let her use her own telekinetic powers to her fullest. She stopped when she saw no apparent threat in the alley.

"What’s wrong?" Buffy demanded.

"Umm." Dawn blushed and pointed at the side of the dumpster. "Rat."

"Rat?" Willow held her hands out in front of her. "A demon hell rat?"

"No, just a rat." Buffy looked at the offending rodent. "Looks a lot like Amy, actually."

"Come on." Anya hurried toward the RV with Tara at her side. They reached it and climbed inside. "Go sit with the nice vampire," Anya said as she went to the front of the RV to start the engine.

"I’m not nice." Spike was clearly offended.

"Where are the damn keys?" Anya slapped the steering wheel. She couldn’t drive the huge vehicle, especially after her ill-fated attempt with Giles’ sports car, but she had planned on getting the engine running. Spike’s abilities as a mechanic were somewhat lacking, and the RV needed to be warmed up even after driving all night.

"What’s wrong?" Spike moved a bit closer.

"Something nasty went after Dawn." Anya dug through the glovebox in search of keys.

"Something hurt the niblet?" Spike’s voice cracked.

"Buffy’s handling it." Anya looked up "So stop worrying about your little playmate."

"She’s not my playmate." Spike scowled. "I just don’t fancy Glory using the Key to open up the gates of hell. I’ve sent quite a few nasties back down there and if that gate gets opened, they’ll be gunning for me."

"Right," Anya said, drawing out the word.

"Just hot wire it," Spike said testily.

"I have barely managed to master steering. How am I supposed to hot-wire this thing?" Anya asked sarcastically.

"I’ll explain it." Spike moved as close to the front windshield as he could while remaining out of the direct sunlight. "Now, crawl under the dash and yank out that bundle of wires."

"If I get electrocuted I’ll stake you myself." Anya struggled under the dash. "Gross. There’s dirt down here." She grunted as she pulled on the closest wire.

"There’s no power, you twit." Spike rolled his eyes.

"Here," Anya sat up and handed Spike the small bundle of wires. "Now what?"

"Bloody hell!" Spike threw his arms up into the air.

"What? Aren’t they hot enough?"

"You… are… not… supposed… to… pull… them… out." Spike wondered if he could smack her before his chip kicked in.

"You said ‘yank out that bundle of wires.’ I yanked them out." Anya tossed the wires to him.

The door opened and Buffy pushed Dawn up the stairs. "Just get in. You scared the hell out of us."

"There was a rat. I screamed. It’s normal." Dawn stumbled up the last stair.

"A rat?" Anya stood and looked at Buffy. "A hell rat?"

"What exactly is a hell rat?" Buffy asked as she rubbed her forehead. She glared at Dawn. "Go sit in back."

"See? It could have been a hell rat," Willow said with smile. She climbed the stairs and scanned the RV. "Where’s Tara?" She spun and faced Anya.

"She’s right…" Anya looked back at the empty bed. "She was…"

"I trusted you to watch her!" Willow yelled. "You lost her?" Willow hurried out the door and scanned the empty street. "Tara?"

Giles and Xander stepped out from the front of the RV.

"Tara’s gone!" Willow said in a panic.

"She can’t have gone far," Giles said reassuringly.

"Tara!" Willow sprinted back toward the building across the street.

"Everyone, split up," Buffy said as she leaped down the stairs. "Xander, you go that way. Giles, you go down there." The slayer pointed as she spoke. "Anya, get your worthless ass into the restaurant and ask if anyone saw her."

"Hey," Xander said angrily. "Don’t talk about her-"

"We trusted her to get Tara safely back here," Buffy said in a growl. "She had one job. Stay with Tara, and now Tara could be anywhere, with anyone, and they could be doing anything to her."

"I’ll go ask the waitress." Anya pushed past Buffy and sprinted toward the restaurant. Tears streaked down her face as she thought about how vulnerable Tara was. When Anya had first lost her demonic powers, it had been terrifying to adjust to being human. She felt alone and weak and spent her time looking over her shoulder for danger. Tara didn’t know enough to look for danger. Anya wondered how many more painful lessons she would have to learn about being human. Death, madness, and a runway half-wit witch should be more than enough for her to get her human diploma.

Tara walked into ‘the Dive" and stared at the darkened room. Even with the liberal amount of sunlight coming in through the open door, the bar was dimly lit. Tara turned her head to one side and smiled as she listened the music coming from the back room. She made her way past the main bar, smiling at the patrons who gave her odd looks. They weren’t used to women coming into this particular bar, well, not women who weren’t wearing at least three pieces of leather clothing.

A gruff man at the end of the bar pinned Tara in his gaze as she wandered into the more private back room where the pool table was.

"Leave her be, Mike," the Bartender said as he wiped the counter.

"Think she made a wrong turn," Mike said. "Or maybe the right one." He stood and tossed a few bills onto the bar.

"I said…leave her be." The bartender reached under the bar and pulled out a baseball bat. He tapped the Louisville Slugger on the well-worn surface of the bar.

"Fine," Mike said as he pulled on his leather jacket. "But you can’t keep everyone in line with that thing." He smiled and leaned back onto the bar.

Tara walked over to the jukebox at the back of the cramped poolroom. Several stern men looked up from their pool game, but most were too busy to worry about the young woman.

The blonde witch smiled and ran her fingers over the smooth plastic of the jukebox. She moved her fingertips down to the worn buttons, many of which had their numbers and letters worn off, and felt the rough surface with her left hand. She rested her cast on top of the machine and stared at the light coming from it. She smiled.

"Haven’t seen you here before," a wiry young man with jet-black hair and a ratlike face said as he leaned against the jukebox.

"Sick sisters always run in pairs." Tara smiled sweetly.

"Um…" the Ratboy scrunched his face and looked back at his friends a few feet away. "Yeah."

"Always run in pairs." Tara furrowed her brow. "Pairs," Tara said plaintively.

"Zack, it’s your turn."

"Sure thing, Darrel." Zack the ratboy gave Tara one last look and went back to the table.

"You like the music?" Darrel asked. He was over six and half feet tall and his chest was wide like a barrel and his chestnut beard reached down to his chest. He looked like the long lost member of ZZ Top.

"Rainbows and kittens." Tara nodded. She looked at Darrel and her face grew pensive. "Golden light, like Willow, but not." She frowned. "Willow?"

"You wanna’ hear something else?" he asked gently. The sound of Clint Black singing was currently making the jukebox vibrate with each beat of the bass. Darrel dug into his grease stained pocket and held out a handful of quarters.

Tara reached for his palm but then frowned at her cast. "The cats know better. They really do. They never paint their nails."

"No, I guess they don’t, darlin’." He chuckled and put four coins into the machine for her. "You just call ol’ Darrel if any o’ the boys get too friendly."

"Willows grow under the big pineapple," Tara seriously.

Darrel went back to his game but kept a watchful eye on the young blonde.

"You dating from the vegetable isle now?" A tall blonde man asked with smirk.

Darrel’s cue stick hit the blonde man squarely in his solar plexus. "You watch yer’ mouth, Billy." He shoved the gasping man against the table and leaned his full weight into him. "And if I see you lookin’ at her again I’ll rip yer eyes outa’ yer head."

"I didn’t mean anything." Billy was terrified. Darrel was known for his even temper, but when he did get angry, people ended up in the hospital.

Darrel nodded and picked up his beer. He tossed the cue stick onto the green felt of the table and went to the side of the bar and leaned against the wall. He watched while Tara took great care as she pushed the jukebox buttons. He smiled and sipped his beer.

"What the hell was that about?" Billy asked as he rubbed his chest.

"Darrel’s older brother is…special." Zack cleared his throat. "You know…special." He twirled his finger over his temple.

"Aw shit." Billy looked over at Tara. "I wasn’t gonna’ do anything."

"Lucky for you." Zack took a shot, sinking a ball. "I think she’s got her own guard dog." He motioned to Darrel.

"Shit, that ain’t no dog. That’s a freaking bear." Billy looked back at Tara. "Too bad. She’s easy on the eyes."

"If you don’t mind Darrel ripping them eyes out." Zack smirked as he sank another ball.

"Tara!" Willow ran along the back of the small block. She was beyond panicked. She scanned down each alley and then spun and looked behind her in case she missed some vital clue. "Oh, god. Tara, baby, I never should have left you." Tears spilled down her cheeks but she didn’t even bother to wipe them away. As she reached the end of the block and circled back toward the diner, she kept remembering the Multicultural fair. She ran along the alley seeing images in her mind of Tara sitting on the bench with Glory. She felt bile rise up in her throat protesting the memory of watching the love of her life having her mind brutally assaulted.

"Whoa," Xander said as he rounded the corner from the opposite direction. He grabbed Willow just before they collided.

"I can’t find her." Willow tried to get past him.

"Let’s go back to the diner and start over." Xander took Willow by both shoulders. "You won’t do her any good if you can’t concentrate."

"Concentrate?" Willow face crinkled as fresh tears fell. "I should have thought about that." She dug into her pocket and pulled out her doll’s eye crystal and placed it on her flattened palm. "Diana, Hestia, Aphrodite, find my… everything." The crystal quivered and then slowly spun and pointed down the street.

"Wow, Wiccan compass." Xander looked down the street toward the diner. "Anya’s already there looking for her," he said as he pointed at Mabel’s.

Willow began jogging toward the Mabel’s sign and her eyes focused just beyond the diner. "The bar!" Willow sprinted down the sidewalk with Xander running to catch up.

By the time they reached the door to the bar Willow was several meters ahead of Xander. She hit the doorway and didn’t even pause as she sprinted inside. She scanned the darkened room, her eyes squinting to see after just coming from the bright sunshine on the street. She didn’t see her beloved so she made a beeline for the man behind the bar.

Under normal circumstances Willow Rosenburg wouldn’t enter a dark, loud bar full of road weary bikers if her life depended on it. This was different. Tara’s life may depend on it.

"Excuse me?" Willow noticed that the crystal was glowing, which meant that Tara was very near. "I’m looking for a blonde woman, about this tall." She held her hand out to show them Tara’s height. "Wearing flannel pants with moons on them and a gray tee shirt."

Xander looked around the room and noticed the door to the back room and went to investigate.

"Any blonde? Or one in particular?" Mike asked with a smile. He was quite pleased with his witty remark until the redheaded fireball yanked him off his barstool and tossed him onto his back.

"Where is she?" Willow’s boot pressed onto his throat.

"Whoa there." The Bartender smiled even as he tried to sound menacing. "No brawling or I’ll have to throw you out," he said, as if his reputation could ever survive being forced to carry the tiny wisp of a girl out to the curb and eject her.

Meanwhile, Xander entered the back room and was horrified by what he saw. Tara was leaning over a pool table trying to manage to hold a pool cue with one good hand. That hadn’t surprised him nearly as much as the mountain of a man that was draped over her body from behind.

"Get away from her!" Xander yelled as he sprinted over and grabbed the man who outweighed Grizzly Adams on steroids.

"Easy there," Darrel said as he moved back. He had been helping Tara take a shot and wasn’t expecting to be blind-sided by a skinny kid.

"Tara, come on." Xander grabbed the blonde’s arm and yanked her away from the table.

"No! Flashes of fire!" Tara dropped the cue stick and squeezed her eyes shut.

"Why you little punk," Darrel picked Xander up by his shirt and tossed him over the pool table. "Keep yer filthy hands to yourself." Darrel didn’t notice the irony of the fact that his own hands were stained with years of motor oil.

In the front of the bar the redhead stood her ground, on the chest of the smart-mouthed patron.

"Have you seen her?" Willow didn’t move her boot but her eyes flickered up to the man behind the bar.

"She’s in the back." He nodded toward the doorway. "Now let offa’ Mike’s neck before he pisses himself."

Willow turned and headed towards the back room at a quick jog, but then she heard Tara scream. Willow’s eyes shaded black as she sprinted toward the sound.

Tara had seen Xander being thrown through the air and terror filled her eyes. She let out a blood-curdling scream and backed toward the wall swatting at her arms. "Darkness swallows the light. Eats it while it tries to sleep."

"Easy there, mister biker killer man," Xander said as he scrambled to his feet. "She’s with me," Xander tried to explain.

"That means you can hurt her?" Darrel rushed over to Tara.

"No. No. No. Treachery and henbane. They kill them. They kill the mice and the dolphins." The blonde witch was pressed to wall, shaking her head from side to side.

"Easy there. Darrel ain’t gonna’ let him hurt you no more." He gently lifted his meaty hand and rested it on Tara’s shoulder.

"No. No. No." Tara continued whispering and she seemed to crawl inside herself.

Willow came through the doorway. The scruffiest biker she had ever seen had his hand on Tara. Her beautiful Tara was saying ‘no’ over and over.

"Get away from her." Willow moved toward him like a tiger hunting in the tall grass, her movements smooth, and liquid, and guided by deadly intent.

"Um, Willow." Xander tried to distract the redhead. He wasn’t sure what was going on, but he was pretty sure the scary man was trying to help.

Darrel looked over at a tiny redhead and he truly felt fear. "He tried to grab her." He positioned his body in front of Tara even as he focused on the approaching woman’s eyes. They looked like a snake’s, black and full of malice.

"Get away from her." Willow’s voice echoed even though she only whispered. She reached out for the man blocking her path to Tara. Just before her fingers touched him, she used her mind to toss him aside.

Tara looked at Willow and her brow furrowed even as the redhead rushed to hug her.

"Are you okay, baby?" Willow’s voice was still shaking.

"Darkness swallows the light." Tara looked into Willow’s eyes and then burst into tears. It was the first time since Glory’s attack that the blonde had actually cried. "Snuffs it out under the anaconda’s shiny feet."

"What did you do to her?" Willow screamed as she turned back toward Darrel.

"I protected her from him." Darrel pointed at Xander.

"Willow, calm down. I’m starting to think that ZZ Top over there is the good guy." Xander moved in front of his best friend and tried to touch her arm. "Ouch!" He yanked his hand away. "You shocked me."

"The light," Tara said between tears.

"Darling?" Willow spun toward her lover. "Are you okay?"

"It’s wrong. They should have told them at the gate." Tara was focusing on Willow’s eyes.

"I’m here," Willow whispered as her heart slowed to a more normal pace. Her eyes shifted back to their normal green. "Tara?"

Tara frowned as confusion bathed her face. "Willow?" She rocked against the wall.

"Yes, baby." Willow ran her hand through Tara’s hair.

"Willow." Tara closed her eyes and swallowed hard.

"Shh," Willow whispered as she pulled Tara into a hug.

"She’s faster than she looks." Zack scooted closer to Darrel.

"I didn’t even see her touch me." Darrel watched the redhead lovingly hold his new blonde friend. Willow looked up gave him an apologetic smile. Her green eyes met his brown. "Man, I’ve had too many beers." Darrel rubbed his face.

Anya and Giles came running into the room. Both let out a relieved sigh when they saw Tara.

"Is she all right?" Giles asked.

"Of course she’s all right." Darrel glared at the Englishman.

"Come on," Willow said as she pulled away from her lover.

"Willow…" Tara shook her head and backed toward the jukebox.

"What is it, baby?" Willow stepped closer.

"Willow?" Darrel chuckled. "Do you grow under the big pineapple?" he asked with a smile as he remembered Tara’s earlier comment.

"It is contagious!" Anya pointed at the husky biker.

Tara’s face lit up.

"What, honey?" Willow looked back at the others and then turned to Tara. "We have to go."

Tara turned and pointed at the Jukebox. A George Straight song finished playing and then the sound of the disc changing made a quiet whirring sound. The blonde Wicca laughed when she saw the number of the new selection blinking on the tiny screen.

"She was pretty interested in the jukebox," Darrel explained. "That was the last of my choices. Hers are up next."

"She chose songs?" Giles asked skeptically.

Tara took Willow’s hand and pressed it over her heart. "Willow…"

Willow smiled and moved closer. "I’m here, love."

"My Willow," Tara said clearly. She looked at the jukebox and then guided Willow into a loose embrace. "The dictionary’s in the blender," she whispered. "Singing my words," she added as she struggled to get her words to make sense.

"You want to tell me these words?" Willow asked as she looked into Tara’s eyes.

Tara nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh, baby. I knew you were in there." Willow pulled Tara close and felt tears running down her cheeks as she heard Trisha Yearwood’s "How do I live"* coming from the jukebox.

Xander and Giles stared, dumbfounded.

Anya raised both eyebrows. "She really does understand her."

Willow listened to the words and tried to hear them in Tara’s voice as they stood in each other’s arms. As soon as she heard the lyrics she sobbed into Tara’s hair.

Giles led Anya and Xander out of the room to give the two witches some privacy while Darrel grabbed Zack and shoved him toward the door for the same reason. The other bikers all hurried out before Darrel had the chance to toss them out.

After the song finished Willow didn’t want to let go of her lover. She held tightly as the next song began. It was Faith Hill’s "There you are,"** and it started a fresh flow of tears.

Tara fought valiantly to stay with Willow but she was exhausted. Halfway through the second song her firm embrace relaxed and she rested her chin on Willow’s shoulder.

Willow felt the change instantly. She pulled back and looked into Tara’s face and saw nothing. She was a blank page. The Redhead’s chest ached and she wanted to scream at the injustice, but instead she left a tender kiss on Tara’s forehead.

"Come on, Tara. Let’s go." She guided her lover toward the door without any resistance.

"So many forks and they’re all plastic," Tara rambled as she shuffled her feet to keep up with Willow. "Their sisters chase mice through the field but the cheese stands alone."

Willow nodded and tried to swallow the painful lump that had formed in her throat. She walked to Darrel and gave him a weak smile. "Thank you," she whispered.

He nodded in response and then smiled at Tara. "Take care."

For a moment Tara’s eyes cleared. "Not all knights ride horses," she said with a genuine smile. Her face clouded over again and she was gone. "Tigers never lock the gates. They should lock the gates." Tara wasn’t focusing anywhere and she spoke quickly in hushed tones. "Gates should be locked. Everybody knows that. The mice know, but nobody listens."

Darrel nodded and then walked back to the poolroom without looking back.

She sun was high, and the air in the bar was oppressively hot. Willow felt like a weight was pressing her heart into her chest. She wrapped her arm around Tara and guided her toward the exit. She wanted her lover back, but at least now she knew that Tara was still there, somewhere, trapped inside. She was more determined than ever to help Tara escape the prison of her own mind. She sighed and went over a list of spells in her mind. One of them would have to help Tara. Willow would try anything, risk anything for the chance to see Tara’s beautiful eyes fill with recognition. Without her blonde lover, Willow was empty. Tara truly was her everything.

* Trisha Yearwood. How do I live.

How do I get through one night without you?

If I had to live without you,

What kind of life would that be?

Oh and I, I need you in my arms.

Need you to hold,

You're my world, my heart, my soul.

If you ever leave,

Baby you would take away everything good in my life.

Without you there'd be no sun in my sky,

There would be no love in my life,

There'd be no world left for me,

And I, baby I don't know what I would do.

I'd be lost if I lost you.

If you ever leave,

Baby, you would take away everything real in my life.

And tell me now,

How do I live without you?

I want to know.

How do I breathe without you?

If you ever go,

How do I ever, ever survive?

How do I, how do I

Oh how do I live?

If you ever leave,

Baby you would take away everything.

Need you with me,

Baby, 'cause you know that you're everything good in my life.,

And tell me now

How do I live without you?

I want to know,

How do I breathe without you?

If you ever go,

How do I ever, ever survive?

How do I, how do I

Oh, how do I live.

How do I live without you?

Without you baby

**There You Are By Mark D. Sanders, Bob DiPiero, Ed Hill

There you are in the early light of day

There you are in the quiet words I pray

I've been blessed by the simple happiness

Of the perfect love we've made

Chorus:

Every time I turn around

When I'm lost and when I'm found

Like an angel standing guard

There you are

Every time I take a breath

And when I forget to breathe

You're watching over me

There you are

When I'm looking for the light

In the middle of the night

Searching for the brightest star

There you are

There you are standing in a crowded room

There you are, the earth and I'm the moon

My desire is to stand by the fire

That burns inside of you

Repeat Chorus

When I'm looking for the light in the middle of the night

Searching for the brightest star

There you are

There you are

There you are